Sims2 PSP: South Park Style
by Sugarbubblegum333
Summary: Kyle gets stuck in a weird town called Strangetown. "That's a…er…strange name for a town" AU South Park
1. Meet Strangetown!

**Title**: Sims2 PSP: South Park Style

**Characters**: Stan, Kyle, Cartman, Kenny, Butters, Craig, Tweek, Token, Clyde and some others.

**Rating**: T

**Summary**: Kyle gets stuck in a weird town called Strangetown. "That's a…er…strange name for a town"

**Pairings**: Hints of Style, Creek, Bunny and Candy.

**Warnings!** Hints of homosexuality. Swearing, Weirdness and possible violence.

**Disclaimer**: I do not own any of the South Park characters. They belong to **Matt Stone** and **Trey Parker**.

**A/N**: So I was playing the game on my PSP and I was wondering what it would be like if Kyle and all the other South Park characters were replacing the characters on Sims2 so waalaa! Here it is :D The characters are based off of personalities to see who would be who. There will be some of my OC's playing some of the characters roles but only because there aren't enough South Park characters to play all of the roles. Don't worry though because the OC's won't be playing large roles, that's all down to the original South Park characters ;D

Also, the speeches they talk are completely the games. The rest is mine. So, when Kyle calls Token by his name but you have no recollection of Token ever telling Kyle his name, don't blame me. That is how the game works. Strange game…

Enjoy!

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><p>Kyle drove as carefully as he could. He was currently on the road to nowhere apparently because he had been driving on the same road for God knows how long and there seemed to be no town or anything within looking distance.<p>

As he contemplated turning back around he stuck his head slightly out of the window to get a better view on where he was going. He watched as the sky was turning more and more darker the longer he drove. He suddenly felt a bump, like something in the road had been the one to cause him to swerve. He tried gaining back control of his car but it was ruthless as he swerved all over the place. Soon enough the car just wasn't going to quit and so Kyle turned the engine off. Getting out he pushed the car down the road and to his luck there was garage just alongside of this deserted road.

Token was lying on the roof of his car, reading a magazine, when he spotted a young man, Kyle, pushing his car towards the garage he owned and he scowled. He did not like the looks of this person already.

Kyle watched as Token walked into his garage and followed after him. Once inside he looked around. The garage was lit with dim pink and red lights and it was pretty dusty. There was one car in here and that seemed to be it. Kyle walked up to the black man and decided to see how much it would cost him to have his car fixed.

Token, however, had other ideas.

"Whoa, whoa, whoa, why you pushin' your car in here?" Token demanded to know.

Kyle looked confused at him and looked around the garage to make sure he was actually seeing it for what it was. "You are a mechanic, right?" He asked.

Token nodded. "Yes, if you want to put it like that, I am a mechanic"

Kyle looked desperate and he shook his ginger locks around. "Well, my car broke down and I'd like to get it fixed. I have money"

As he was about to reach into his pocket for the money Token's anger caught him off guard.

"It's not about the money. It's about respect!" Token yelled, getting huffier and huffier with time.

Kyle raised an eyebrow and shook his head. "Respect...? I don't follow"

"You come in here, you say I'm a mechanic, you offer me money to fix your car…" Token listed off, looking somewhat calmer than before.

Kyle was growing more and more confused with time. "Isn't that how it works?"

That's when Token lost it. I'm not just talking pissed, he literally screamed and spat in Kyle's face to which the aforementioned victim just stood there taking it all in whilst wiping away any droplets of saliva that happened to fly on him.

"Man, I am not just ANY mechanic. I am the BEST mechanic. I am an artist!" He yelled and flailed his arms around, trying to get his point across. The only thing it really did was prove to Kyle that he was even more insane than he looked.

"You don't go up to Michelangelo and say, 'Hey, I want a Mona Lisa, here's some money!'" Token yelled more and more.

Kyle hesitantly decided to reply. "Michelangelo didn't paint the Mona Lisa"

"He didn't paint it because they didn't give him no respect!" Token yelled back, growing more and more aggravated if that was possible.

Kyle now knew that Token thinks Michelangelo painted the Mona Lisa. Whoop de doo…

"Okay…I'm sorry, what are you asking me to do?" Kyle asked, trying to calm the temperamental man down.

"Just talk to me! Don't come in here with your money like I'm a servant! Talk to me like a human being" Token's breaths were ragged and he sighed, pinching the bridge of his nose.

"I'm talking to you now" Kyle replied, really nervous about angering the mechanic again.

"No, not like this, not like it's all business and stuff. I just want to SOCIALIZE! I want to CHAT!" Token explained, trying to get the red haired man in front of him to understand.

'_Maybe you should get out more often then' _Kyle thought, rolling his eyes. "You don't get out much, do you?"

"No, not really" Token said completely calm now, while he shrugged. Kyle blinked taken aback and sighed, not understand the man's hormonal swings.

"Alright, we'll chat" Kyle answered, giving in to the man's desires.

So they talked about the city and Skiing and…uh, fat sumo wrestlers much to the confusion of poor Kyle but hey, who was he to judge? As their conversation ended they shook hands and smiled. Well, Token smiled. Kyle just gave an awkward constipated grin.

"See? That wasn't so hard, now, was it?" Token teased, grinning.

"I guess not…" Kyle replied, confused with this whole situation.

"Now it's like we're friends. And you know what? I think I'm going to give you a friendly discount!" Token offered, grinning from ear to ear.

Kyle blinked, stupidly and was wondering when this garage man went from torturing his ears with irrational yells to giving discounts to people he had only just met.

"Aw, Token, you don't have to do that!" Kyle smiled but deep down he was finding this all weird and demanding that Token gives him his discount right now.

"No worries. I like you, and you deserve it. Five hundred dollars" Token said, smiling and placing his hand in front of him, waiting.

Kyle pulled out the needed money and handed it over before grinning. "Thanks" He said, grateful that he still had most of his money.

"Well, I better get to work. You go hang out in the Curio Shoppe for a while, and I'll tell you when it's ready" Token assured, walking off.

"Okay, I'll see you later!" Kyle said, not sure on where this 'Curio Shoppe' was but he was sure he didn't want to talk to the crazy mechanic named Token again until he had his car fixed. He was supposed to be seeing his mum today, for God's sake!

"Go say hi to Mambo Bebe for me. She's the lady at the counter. She'll keep you entertained" Token called after Kyle who had stopped at the door to listen to him.

Kyle frowned. "You keep telling me what to do. Stop that"

Token grinned in secret amusement. "Get used to it around here. People are always asking you to do things! Like fixing their cars, for instance"

Kyle raised his eyebrows and bit his lip. "How do you keep track of it all?"

Token wiped his dirty hands on a cloth and smiled. "I just keep a list! You should try it"

"Thanks. I'll keep that in mind…" Kyle replied, frowning slightly still before walking out of the place.

Once he was outside he took a look around. Crickets were chirping and it was getting pretty dark out but it still held a tinge of sunset to it. Kyle walked around the garage and towards the main road area. He noticed that as he passed the walls, they had graffiti on them and there was rubbish everywhere. It wasn't the kind of place Kyle really wanted to stay in.

When he got outside what he thought to be the Curio Shoppe there was a large rocket ship and a police car parked right outside. It was all very strange but then Kyle noticed someone lurking outside of the shop. He looked to be a policeman with brown scruffy hair and hazel eyes. He had what appeared to be little chubby belly and quite puffy cheeks but you wouldn't exactly call him fat. Deciding that because he was a policeman after all Kyle figured he could help him so he walked up to him to greet him.

"You doin' all right there, kid? You look lost" The policeman couldn't have been older than Kyle's age which was twenty one and yet he apparently still felt the need to call him a kid in such a disrespectful way.

"My car broke down. I'm just killing time till it's fixed" Kyle answered, more than a little agitated by the man's condescending tone.

"So, is there anything I can do to help?" The policeman asked.

"Where exactly am I anyway?" Kyle asked, curious as to the whereabouts that was surrounding him.

"This is the Silver Rocket Service Station. Named for that big rocket over there" The policeman said, proudly.

"You don't say…" Kyle murmured, his voice dripping with sarcasm.

Clyde grinned. "That's right!" He obviously didn't detect the sarcasm Kyle had used. Freakin' idiot… "And if you head up this road a speck, you'll come to Strangetown"

"That's a…er…strange name for a town" Kyle answered, just a little bit freaked out.

"It's named after Sheriff Paul Strange, the first lawman around these parts" The policeman said, clearly idolizing this Paul Strange guy.

"Fascinating…" Kyle spoke up, trying to sound as enthusiastic as possible.

"He's actually my great-great-great uncle on my mother's side" That explains the worshipping tone of voice.

"Okay…time to change the subject" Kyle said, finding all this talk about strange people…well…uh, strange?

"So, is there anything else I can do to help?" The policeman asked.

"No, I'm fine. I'll talk to you later" Kyle figured out the policeman wasn't going to be much help so he walked off leaving the man to talk to himself about…tacos? What a strange man. But then considering he had strange genes in him it wasn't a shock that he was strange himself.

So with that, Kyle walked up to the Curio Shoppe and opened the doors. Walking in he noticed how small and dirty the shop was. Mind you, being next to a garage wasn't really going to make the shop look like its roses on a green bush.

Kyle looked around and spotted a blonde haired woman working behind a counter. She had on a weird cloth on her hair that wrapped around the top part of her head and dangled down the back. She was wearing a tiny rouge coloured top that showed off her belly and a really long mouldy green coloured skirt with a gold buckled belt holding it up. She had her arms crossed against her enormous chest, her eyes closed and she seemed to be swaying back and forth, humming something.

Kyle guessed this was Mambo Bebe so he walked right up to her. Stopping in front of her he paused and then was about to speak up but Bebe interrupted him.

"Hello there, young one! Welcome to Mambo Bebe's Curio Shoppe!" Bebe spoke up, bright and cheerful.

"Hi! Glad to be here" Kyle said, smiling slightly at Bebe's happy mood.

"You can't lie to Mambo Bebe. I know that right now, you would rather be anyplace else than here" Bebe said, pointing her finger in Kyle's face.

Kyle shifted in discomfort. "I guess that's true" He admitted.

"You see? Mambo Bebe know everything" Bebe grinned and nodded her head, as if to reassure herself that the statement was true.

Kyle couldn't really fathom how she could tell he'd rather be elsewhere but he guessed it was due to the anxious and nervous nature he brought into the little shop. That was the only possible way she could have known. "No-one knows everything" Kyle stated.

"Except you, is that right? Ha ha! Let Mambo Bebe SHOW you how much she know" Bebe's choppy and ridged sentences were driving Kyle insane considering he was a grammar nerd.

"How are you going to do that?" Kyle asked, sceptical.

"Mambo Bebe will give you a reading!" Bebe exclaimed, grinning showing her pearly white teeth.

"What kind of reading?" Kyle asked, raising an eyebrow.

"The best kind of reading, very scientific!" Bebe clapped her hands together in glee.

Kyle never really like Science, only Math and English really, but he kept listening anyway, interested to see how this would work out.

"Just answer the questions, an Mambo Bebe will tell you your personality!" Bebe smiled and put her hands together, while fluttering her eyelashes.

"So, it's like a personality test?" Kyle questioned and wondered whether this was actually worth anything.

"Like a test, but better, because it is with Mambo Bebe!" Bebe's blue eyes shined in excitement while Kyle felt like dying a little on the inside.

"Alright…I guess I've gotten nothing better to do" Kyle muttered and sighed.

Bebe then raised her hand and circled it around Kyle's face with him giving her a stare to show how freak out he was. Is she for real..?

"Alright. We start with the first question. Why are you traveling?" Bebe asked, with her eyes closed now.

"I'm exploring. I feel like there's a world of knowledge out there just waiting for me to discover it" Kyle muttered, more than a little angry at having to go through this. _'Yeah, let's just forget the fact that I was visiting my mother today' _

"Excellent" Bebe whispered, more to herself then Kyle. "Now, what would you do if you had a million dollars?"

"I'd spend it on big parties and make lots of new friends" Kyle answered, drearily.

"How interesting…if you could swap your old car with any car in the world, what would it be?" Bebe asked, still waving her hand around a bit.

Kyle thought about this for a bit before answering. "A stretch limousine, with room for all my friends"

"Hmm…And what would you do if your best friend wrecked your car?" Bebe asked.

Kyle shook his head a little at the question. "We'd have a long talk about it. But in the end, a good friend is more important than a car"

"You make a good point…So what do you look for in a romantic partner?"

Kyle blushed and raised an eyebrow at the awkward question. "Someone I can talk to for hours and hours"

Bebe still waved her hand out in front of her in Kyle's face and Kyle was getting ticked off about it now. "Ooh, we are getting very close now. If you were an animal, what would you be?"

'_These questions are ridiculous' _Kyle thought to himself. "Uh…something magical, like a dragon or a Pegasus"

"Wonderful! And now for the final question…" Bebe said.

"I can hardly wait…" Kyle drawled, sarcastically. He tried batting the hand away but Bebe just smacked his own hand away, back.

"Your best friend is keeping a secret from you. What do you do?" Bebe asked.

"My friends don't keep secrets from me" Kyle said, a little shocked at the question.

"Okay…there is a feeling now…yes, it is getting clearer…" Bebe started saying.

"Yeah, I think it's that burrito I ate earlier. Sorry" Kyle replied bashfully, smiling sheepishly.

"I have it! I know your aspiration and personality!" Bebe stated with her eyes still closed.

"What's the difference?" Kyle asked, confused.

"Your aspiration is what you want out of life. Money, friends, knowledge…that sort of thing" Bebe stated, opening her eyes now and looking at Kyle smiling.

"Okay…" Kyle said, still listening.

"Your aspiration in knowledge. You want to uncover all the secrets of the universe" Bebe stated, grinning.

Kyle shuffled on the spot. "That's right…"

"Now Mambo Bebe will you your personality. You are…"

Kyle narrowed his eyes in thought. This probably wasn't going to be good…

"…A Gemini. You are very focused, and you always get things done!" Bebe said, her eyes widening with her happiness.

"Yep, that's me!" Kyle said, really quite impressed with how she figured that one out.

"You see? Mambo Bebe knows what she is about! It is the magic of the Mambo!" Bebe grinned and waved her hands about.

"Very impressive" Kyle answered, smiling.

"Well, now that you understand yourself more fully, you should go and fulfil one of your wants" Bebe said, cocking her right hip to the side.

'_Wants? What is she on about now..?' _"How do I do that?" Kyle asked, perplexed.

"Everyone's wants are different. I cannot tell you how to fulfil them. You must do that yourself" Bebe raised one eyebrow and sneered.

"Fine" Kyle sighed, already giving up in defeat. He was tired off all these silly little things in this town.

He looked around to see what he could find and walked over to a door. It was left open and it was red. Peering in Kyle realized it was a bathroom that was grungy and disgusting with one sink and one toilet. There was a small piece of paper in the corner of the bathroom which made Kyle quirk an eyebrow. Walking over to it, he picked the puzzling piece of paper up and read it.

_Secrets of Romance: The shortest route to a man's heart is through the Vena Cava._

Kyle blinked and shook his head before looking back to the paper to see if he was imagining this. Nope, still the same. What a weird thing to write and then dump in a gas station's bathroom…

He placed it in his shoulder bag, which I forgot to mention earlier but now you know, and walked out of the bathroom.

That's when he noticed a twitchy little teen about his age slumping through the shop. He was walking with his head hung low and his hands hung in front of him while he dragged his body. He twitched every now and again and looked around, wide eyed and nervous. He had blond really messed up hair and moss coloured eyes which held purple marks under them while his face was quite pale and narrowed.

Kyle decided to greet himself and see if this person was normal.

"Hi, I'm K-"

"I just HAVE to get out of here!" The man shouted.

Okay, maybe no-one was normal around here.

"Are you alright?" Kyle asked, worried.

"Do I look alright? This town is going to drive me crazy!" The man yelled and waved his arms up above his head, while his eyes widened even more if that was possible.

"What happened to you?" Kyle asked, curiously.

"I…I'm sorry, it's just too horrible. I can't tell you" The man said in a much quieter yet more fearful voice.

"Uh…I'll talk to you later" Kyle said and left the man talking to himself while jumping every now and again.

Kyle noticed Bebe waving him over and walked over, giving her a confused look and stopped in front of her.

"There, do you not feel better, now that your wants are fulfilled?" Bebe asked, grinning.

"I'm not sure…how can I tell if it worked?" Kyle asked, more than confused right now.

"When you fulfil a want, you gain an increase to your sanity" Bebe explained, placing her finger to her lips with her right arm holding her left arm in place and cocking her hip to the side.

Kyle carried on listening, intently.

"It is very important to keep your sanity high. When it is low, everything becomes more difficult. Especially socializing" Bebe leaned forward, smirking. "No one wants to talk to a loony…and if your sanity falls to zero, you'll probably be committed!"

Kyle flinched back a bit. Ugh, he really didn't want to go to a mental institution. "Ugh, that sounds awful"

"But if you keep your sanity high, you can learn things faster, and people will like you more!" Bebe went on to say.

"So, I should keep my sanity high by fulfilling my wants" Kyle said and raised an eyebrow, raking his fingers through his ginger hair.

"Exactly" Bebe confirmed and grinned.

"Great" Kyle really did not know what to think of any of this anymore.

"So…you have already learned how to chat with people here in Strangetown, right?" Bebe asked, waving her hands around a bit.

"Yeah, the mechanic wouldn't fix my car until I did" Kyle answered, angry about the whole conversation he and that mechanic had.

"Ha ha ha! Token is so cute. Anyway, one of the reasons you chat with people is to discover their secrets" Bebe grinned and clapped her hands together, enthusiastically.

"You don't say…" Kyle said, feeling that the reason for that was just a little bit disrespectful.

"If someone trusts you, they will confide in you. Try it out on Tweek Tweak" Bebe pointed to the twitchy man.

"Try what out?" Kyle asked.

"Go and chat with him until he tells you his secret" Bebe said in a tone that made Kyle feel like she was calling him stupid.

"Actually, I think I already got his secret by myself" Kyle said in a very proud tone, puffing out his chest and grinning.

"I suddenly sense with my inner eye that you have learned Tweek's secret" Bebe said, waving her arms around again.

Kyle deflated and gave Bebe a look that said 'Are you serious?' "You mean you heard me tell you that"

"Do not question the ways of Mambo!" Bebe yelled, angrily.

"Okay, okay…" Kyle shook his hands out in front of himself as if to surrender.

"People in Strangetown have many secrets" Bebe said, tapping one finger against the temple of her head.

"I already know all about secrets" Kyle answered, really wanting to skip past the whole secret topic.

"And now, Mambo Bebe will teach you the ways of love!" Bebe grinned and pointed a finger in the air.

"Whoa, WHAT? Where did THAT come from?" Kyle questioned, shocked.

"It is an important skill, so Mambo Bebe will teach you!" Bebe said, leaning forward a bit smirking.

"Um, can't I learn the ways of love from someone a bit more…my type?" Kyle asked bashfully, leaning back a bit.

"Ha ha ha! No, no, no. I will teach you, but you will practice on someone else" Bebe said, chuckling and shaking her head a little bit.

"Whew! Alright, that's good" Kyle said, breathing out a sigh of relief.

"Never you worry. Flirting is much like chatting" Bebe explained.

"I already know how to flirt" Kyle said, cockily and smirking.

"Good luck with your flirting, then!" Bebe said in a cruel tone, smirking and laughed.

"Thanks!" Kyle said, happily obviously not getting the sarcasm. Almost as stupid as the policeman, obviously…

"Now, make sure you flirt with Tweek or Clyde, the policeman. They are lonely, and will be easier to win" Bebe said, puckering her lips somewhat and grinning.

"That is so very sad. Goodbye" Kyle said in a tone that didn't show any sympathy but did Bebe care? Nope. No-one gives two squats here in Strangetown. Not that that's not expected with a name like that…

Kyle waved goodbye and then looked around the shop and saw Tweek…sleeping on a bench…in a shop?

Tweek then woke up and Kyle saw his chance. Waving, he made sure to look comforting and not evil. Tweek waved back…sort of…it was more like a weird witches, crooked fist wave…or maybe something else…

Never mind, Tweek waved. There, that's it. Anyway, Kyle watched as Tweek stood and decided to greet the poor guy.

"Hey, you look lonely" Kyle said in his best flirtatious tone and flashed his best charming smile.

"What do you want?" Tweek asked, grumpily.

Kyle was now reconsidering his decision.

"Just thought I would talk and get to know you better, you know, since we're…almost alike really" Kyle said, still trying to put on his most pleasant smile which probably just freaked poor Tweek out.

"Oh, really? Ngh! I don't, gah, see how!" Tweek bit out.

Kyle was getting fed up but he had to learn the ways of love or, to put it bluntly, the bullshit that Mambo Bebe was teaching him.

"Look, I like you, you like me. How's about we just kiss and be done with it, okay?" Kyle said, smirking.

"How, Urk, about you p-piss off, ngh, instead" Tweek said, harshly and Kyle frowned.

"Okay, fine, listen to me a sec. I have to get one kiss from you or else Mambo Bebe will get pissed at me. Please, just one kiss?" Kyle pleaded.

Tweek looked at him sceptically and then sighed. "Alright, ngh, fine! GAH!" He then grabbed a shocked Kyle by the shoulders and kissed him square on the mouth. Kyle just stood there, surprised and with his eyes wide.

Tweek let go with a smack and wiped his lips with his sleeve. "There! Ngh!" And walked off.

Kyle just stood there with his eyes still wide and his mouth now agape. He was ridge but managed to, somehow, walk over to Mambo Bebe. When he got there Bebe grinned.

"Ah, yes, the flirting is complete. Mambo Bebe can sense the glow" Bebe said, smirking at Kyle's freaked out expression.

"That was kind of weird…" Kyle finally managed out.

"Love takes work, child. You must greet people often, or call them on the phone, to hold onto your relationships" Bebe explained making sure Kyle took this all in.

Kyle shook his head, rolling his eyes. "Okay, I'll remember that…now it's time for me to go"

"You cannot go!" Bebe shrieked out, her hands flying in the air.

"Why not?" Kyle asked, freaked.

"You have not yet sampled Mambo Bebe's low low prices!" Bebe exclaimed, smiling.

"I knew it! This was a scam all along! I'm leaving!" Kyle yelled, angry.

As Kyle was about to leave he heard Bebe speak up.

"Wait, I sense your future…" Bebe commented, waving her hands in front of herself again.

Kyle rolled his eyes and tapped his foot on the ground impatiently, waiting.

"…I sense that your car will not be repaired until you try one of Mambo Bebes's excellent deals!" Bebe grinned and opened her arms up in front of herself.

"So Token's in on the scam too, huh?" Kyle furrowed his eyebrows and narrowed his eyes at the woman in front of him.

"There is no escaping your destiny. Mambo Bebe has spoken" Bebe stated, her tone making it final.

Kyle sighed and gave in. "Okay, FINE. This had better be really CHEAP"

"Just go around to the cash register whenever you want to buy things" Bebe explained not answering to his demands.

Kyle clucked his tongue. "Okay…"

He walked around to the front of the cash register and stood there, glaring. He looked and saw he had a choice between an ice cream that cost $15 and a hunger bar that cost $20. He chose the ice cream and handed Bebe the money. He then ate the ice cream and felt the cold substance go down his throat. To be honest with you, he actually was feeling kind of peckish so that had helped him.

He then walked around the register and stood in front of Bebe.

"You came back for your next task?" Bebe asked, grinning slyly.

'_When did this ever become tasks?' _Kyle thought to himself. He groaned and looked at her. "I guess…"

"Well, too bad, I got no task for you! Go check on your car!" Bebe said, glaring and huffing.

"Finally" Kyle exclaimed, ecstatic.

Kyle ran up to the door and opened them. Walking outside, he ran around the corner, grinning before he stopped in his tracks.

The whole fucking garage was missing! Completely gone! His car was missing and the garage along with the man inside it, Token, was missing!

That's when Kyle noticed a phone on the floor that was ringing. Walking over to it, he contemplated answering when he shrugged and picked the phone up. Flipping it open, he answered.

"Hello! Have you lost something?" A gruff voice asked.

"What have you done with my car, you scoundrel!" Kyle demanded, shouting down the phone.

"Why, I haven't done anything! Right now, I'm about twelve miles away from you. Too far to have had a hand in your misfortune" The voice answered, sounding calm.

"Oh yeah? Prove it!" Kyle demanded, practically seething.

"Well, I can hardly prove anything to you from way over here. But I have an idea" The voice reasoned and Kyle raised an eyebrow.

"What's that?" He asked, sceptically.

"You should come work for me! I've been looking for a new assistant for weeks now" The voice said, gleefully.

"Work for you? Why?" Kyle asked, more than a little confused.

"Well, with your car missing, you'll need some means of making money until you get on your feet again" The voice said and the truth in those words made Kyle think about a few things. But still…

"Trusting you is the last thing I'll do!" Kyle shouted.

"You don't have to trust me! My money is all you need. Just do the job, take the cash, and never speak to me again" The voice of the man down the phone explained.

"I like it. Especially the last part" Kyle said, grinning.

"The first thing you need to do is get a ride to Paradise Place" The man said.

"And the second thing?" Kyle questioned.

"Then you should secure yourself a home nearby. I pay well, but I don't provide free lodging" The man explained.

"So I need a ride and a place to stay" Kyle said and sighed.

"Yes. Don't bother trying to get here until you have both. The outdoors here are quite wild" The man said and Kyle thought he could almost sense a smirk in that tone.

"Walking across the desert and living on the street are both quite dangerous pursuits, and I won't have you getting killed" The man said.

Kyle raised an eyebrow and cocked his right hip out, placing his right hand to lean on it. "I appreciate that" He was actually quite surprised at the sense the man was going through just so that he wouldn't get killed.

"I may contact you again on this cell phone. Are you sure you know how to use it?" The man asked.

Kyle slapped his hand against his own forehead and gritted his teeth together. "I've done this before…I know all about perks like this cell phone"

"Excellent. I will see you when you arrive" The man said.

"Bye" Kyle said and flipped the phone closed.

This was going to take a while…

* * *

><p><strong>AN: **So, how do you like it so far? I was going to post this after I had finished Crush but I decided with the help of a friend of mines to just go ahead and post this now :)

Remember to review and let me know what you think! :D


	2. Ghosts!

**Title**: Sims2 PSP: South Park Style

**Characters**: Stan, Kyle, Cartman, Kenny, Butters, Craig, Tweek, Token, Clyde and some others.

**Rating**: T

**Summary**: Kyle gets stuck in a weird town called Strangetown. "That's a…er…strange name for a town"

**Pairings**: Hints of Style, Creek, Bunny and Candy.

**Warnings!** Hints of homosexuality. Swearing, Weirdness and possible violence.

**Disclaimer**: I do not own any of the South Park characters. They belong to **Matt Stone** and **Trey Parker**.

Reviews!

**HighOffOfSouthPark- **You did have the first review~! :3 Thank you, glad you could enjoy it. Token's a bit…uh, weird, isn't he? XD Mambo Bebe was a lot of fun to write. She's very weird in this and colourful, shall I say? Kyle's not very good with the flirting when it comes to men but yes, at least he got his kiss. That's all that matters :) Haha, glad it's hilarious. I was hoping it was XD I've updated Crush since this has been posted :D Aw, I'm sorry :C No, I don't want Kay to be sad. Don't be sad, Kay! I'm supposing you're a happy panda now, right? XD C:

**ultraman118- **Thank you. I'm glad it's funny. Kyle's curious, I will say. I think I wanted him to be straight in this story but have to be in situations that involve him being gay if that makes any sense :)

**Cupcake Queen Liz- **There is indeed a storyline to the one on PSP. It's a very good game and it's the first Sims game with a storyline. I love playing it :D

I'm glad it was funny :) Haha, that is exactly what Sims are like. They all act angry and then change their emotions faster than a bullet XD Yep, Clyde's being a psycho again with his tacos XD

Mambo Bebe is hilarious. I made Bebe Mambo Loa because Mambo Loa is a bit of a crazy woman and Bebe seems like she suits that. I have a slight liking to the pairing, Kyleek XD Which I haven't told to anyone until now. Sssh!

Updated now! :D I hope you like this chapter :)

**Raining Skittles- **It's quite a weird story, I'll admit, but I have a feeling I'm going to like writing this story.

**Color Me Pretty- **I've beaten it so many times now :D I love the game more than I should :3 Where did you get up to on the game and I could help you from there. I know every part of the game like the back of my hand now =]

They're both enjoyable characters, right? XD I found it amusing too, that's why I'm writing it :)

Updated! :D ;P

**A/N: **So, here is the second chapter. I'm having so much fun writing this one and I will admit, it's funny seeing the characters in South Park acting out the parts of the game characters, to me anyway XD

Enjoy! :D

* * *

><p>He noticed Officer Clyde walking around outside the Curio Shoppe so he decided to see if he had a ride into Strangetown he could borrow. It was worth a shot…<p>

Walking up to the tall police officer, he stopped him by smiling and waving towards him. Officer Clyde waved back and Kyle stopped to talk to him.

Officer Clyde grinned and shifted his belt a bit. "Anything I can help you with?"

"Actually, I'm looking for a ride into town…" Kyle started off, nervous.

"I wouldn't mind a drive myself. But I've got a bit of a problem" Officer Clyde rubbed his chin and squinted his eyes in thought.

Kyle raised an eyebrow. "Don't tell me…you're out of donuts" He joked and laughed at his own joke.

"Exactly! How did you know?" Officer Clyde grinned and pointed to Kyle while holding his belt with the other hand.

Kyle blanched a bit and his mouth fell open. _'I just meant it as a joke but it's actually true?' _ "Lucky guess…"

"See, Mambo Bebe just told me she's out of donuts, but I know she's got a secret stash somewhere" Officer Clyde explained, looking a bit agitated.

"All right…" Kyle replied, getting a bit creeped out.

"I need you to find out where her donuts are and bring them to me" Officer Clyde explained.

"Done!" Kyle exclaimed, looking at him with worried eyes.

"All right, just come back when you've got 'em, and I'll give you a ride into town" Officer Clyde answered, grinning from ear to ear while pleased that he finally got someone to do it.

"Deal!" Kyle blurted out, rushing to get this over with and get his ride into Strangetown.

He waved goodbye to Officer Clyde and walked away, instantly knowing he'll regret this later. He pushed open the two big red doors into the Curio Shoppe and walked in, looking around.

He couldn't see Tweek anywhere so he instantly assumed that he was in the bathroom. However, he did see the person he really wanted to talk to. Besides, trying to talk to Tweek would just humiliate himself even further.

Standing in front of a puzzled yet chirpy Mambo Bebe, he waved and smiled, nervously.

"Yes? What would you like today? Some low prices, perhaps?" Mambo Bebe asked, grinning.

Kyle pursed his lips and cocked a hip to the side, trying to seem more confident and sure about what he was doing. "I'm looking for some delicious donuts"

Mambo Bebe instantly turned sour. Her expression changed from one of harmony to one of anger. "OH no! I see in your heart that you seek to deceive!" She batted her hands at him and cringed in disgust.

"Honest, all I want is a donut…" Kyle tried persuading her but to no avail.

"If Clyde wants a donut, you can tell him to get it his own self!" Mambo Bebe screeched, poking him hard in the chest to emphasize her point.

Kyle felt the jab to his chest and cringed. Flinching under her sharp tongue, Kyle decided to give up. "Fine…"

As he was about to walk off, he thought of his mother and how happy she would be to see him after a year and a half. Getting angry, he decided to use some of that jersey anger he had been born with.

Turning back to her, Kyle glared and narrowed his green eyes at her. Mambo Bebe's frown turned into a look of confusion as she watched him clench his fists in irritation. Kyle got up in her face and started yelling.

"Do you know how much of a fucking bad day I've been having? When I started out on this journey all I fucking well wanted was to drive to my mother but could that happen? Oh noooo, of course not. Because mother fucking earth has it out for me, what with me being a Jew and all! You make me SICK!" He spat out.

Mambo Bebe cringed and stepped back a bit as she felt those words dig deep. "Hey, dude, chill…"

"No, you fucking well listen! I slave and slave for hours on perfecting that fucking picture for that stupid, fucking book and what do I get? Less than I would expect! I needed that money for my fucking journey and do you know how I spent some of that money?"

Mambo Bebe rubbed her arm, uncomfortably as she started feeling guilty as she knew where this was going. "Uh…on"

"On your fucking, cheap, useless bargains! I hope you're fucking happy! You've ruined my life, you whore! Maybe you'll learn to be less of a bitch in hell, you cow!"

When Kyle had finished, Mambo Bebe's blue eyes started to fill with tears and that's when she broke down. All those words stung and she hung her head in shame as she started bawling her eyes out.

"Alright, God damn! The donuts are in the rubbish bin in the toilet!" Mambo Bebe wept out.

Kyle felt a sense of pride at having finally done something to solve a problem on his own. But he also felt guilt; Guilt for having brought a woman to tears. He's never done that before. Probably because women generally don't throw themselves at him, only for him to break their hearts by rejecting them, but still…

He decided to apologize. How, he didn't know but he would try.

Crouching a bit to look into Mambo Bebe's eyes, Kyle placed a hand on her shoulder. "Hey, hey, look, I'm sorry okay?"

Still crying, Mambo Bebe answered his apology. "You little twerp! That's not the way you're going to win me back. Give me some money!"

Kyle flinched back a bit in shock and glared. "Why..?"

"You want my friendship back, don't you?" Mambo Bebe asked, standing up straight to look at him with a glare while her eyes were still filled with tears.

'_Not really…'_ "Well, of course, I do but" Kyle started only to be interrupted.

"Then give me some money!" Mambo Bebe screeched.

"But why money?" Kyle asked.

"You made a woman cry and the only way to solve that is through money" Mambo Bebe answered.

Kyle rolled his eyes and glared but pulled out his brown, worn out wallet anyway and looked at Mambo Bebe with an eyebrow raised.

"How much..?" He asked.

"Ten dollars should cover it" Mambo Bebe answered, pouting.

Kyle grinned. That wasn't so much…

He handed over ten dollars and smiled, hoping to get back at least one person as his friend. God knows he's going to need all the friends he can get around this strange place…

Mambo Bebe snatched the money out of his hand and searched it, making sure the right amount was given. When she was sure it was all there, she smiled and placed it in her pocket. Kyle glared now and waited. Mambo Bebe turned back to her cash register but stopped and blinked when she saw Kyle waiting there for something. Raising an eyebrow, she spoke up to him.

"What were you expecting? A friendship hug..?" She drawled out, glaring.

Kyle's eyes widened and then he glared, sick of the people here. Stalking away, he muttered angrily to himself. He almost forgot what he was supposed to be doing when he remembered he had to get the donuts. He cringed as he remembered that they were in the rubbish bin. He sighed, knowing he would have to do it though if he ever wanted to get a ride.

Walking into the toilet, he turned his head down and saw the bin, just sat there looking at him. He almost turned and walked away but stopped himself.

'_You have to do this, Kyle! What would your dad say? Actually, my dad would tell me to back out of it, telling me it would cause many germs to infest my hands and give me nasty illnesses so maybe I shouldn't listen to him in my head. Just get it over with!' _

Kyle ended his thoughts and kneeled down next to the bin. Looking at it, he could see all the nasty cans and banana peels everyone had put into there and he almost threw up looking at it all. He knew he didn't have to do this really, but then at the same time, he had to.

Reaching in, he fished his hand around and dug it in there, feeling every piece of litter he knew people dumped into here. His hand felt something slippery and he stuck his tongue out in disgust. Moving his hand away from it, Kyle felt around some more and found what he was looking for. Feeling the round squishy, donuts he pulled them out and saw they were in a cellophane bag. Not feeling any better about that, he yanked them out more and closed the lid to the rubbish bin and stood up. His body had turned into jelly and his red locks stood bright against his now sickly, white skin.

Moving away from the bin, he walked out of the toilet and ambled past a smirking Mambo Bebe towards the entrance and exit. Walking out the door, he looked around for Officer Clyde.

When he found him, Kyle slowly made his way over to him. He stood in front of a now grinning Officer Clyde.

"Howdy, partner! How are things going?" Officer Clyde asked, cheerfully.

Kyle glared sourly at him and seethed in anger. "You know, the usual" He answered, sarcastically.

"So, is there anything I can do to help?" Officer Clyde asked, grinning.

'_Yeah, you can jump up your own ass and die…' _Kyle thought to himself and glared. "Actually, I'm looking for that ride into town…"

"Do you have the donuts?" Officer Clyde asked, looking at Kyle with uncertainty.

"Yes…" Kyle shoved the donuts into Officer Clyde's hands and scowled, again.

"Mm…delicious donuts" Officer Clyde said greedily, as he ate the donuts in his hands.

Kyle didn't even bother telling him about them being in the bin because, as sick as this may sound, it gave him great pleasure to watch him eat them and then tell him the disgusting news.

"About that ride…" He started.

"Do you have a place to stay once you get there?" Officer Clyde asked, pocketing the rest of his donuts.

"Um…no" Kyle answered, really regretting talking to this guy.

"Well, I'm not driving you all that way just to be a vagrant. Find yourself a home!" Officer Clyde bit out.

"Okay, I'll be back when I've found a place to crash" Kyle answered, as if to make sure the ride was still an offer once he got back.

He walked away and contemplated how to get a place where he could live temporarily. He knew there were only two people he could ask: Mambo Bebe and Tweek Tweak. But who to ask..?

If he really thought about it, Mambo Bebe was out of the question considering their friendship wasn't exactly the most stable relationship out there and plus the fact that Mambo Bebe was a bitch anyways so…

He guessed it would have to be Tweek Tweak. But the humiliation of actually having to talk to him again. God, it's going to be embarrassing. He kissed him for Christ's sake…

Walking into the little shop, Kyle looked around for the twitchy man. Finding him, Kyle swallowed whatever pride and dignity he had left and walked up to him.

"Tweek..?" Kyle asked, unsure.

Tweek turned to him and narrowed his eyes a bit before sighing. Cocking one hip to the left, he twitched and asked "What do you, GAH, want?"

"I'm looking for a place to stay…" Kyle started, unsure of whether he could ask him this now.

"Really? That's p-perfect! I've been, ngh, looking for someone to s-sell my house to!" Tweek burst out, grinning and twitching a bit as he yelled this.

Kyle leaned back a bit and looked at him, freaked out. "To sell your…WHAT? I'm not looking to buy anything. I just need a place to crash"

"Well, I'm leaving town and, NGH, never coming back. You can, Gah, buy my house, or you c-can, GAH, sleep in the shop here" Tweek said with a deadpan expression, crossing his arms across his chest.

Kyle sighed. "How much are you asking for it?"

"Oh, only about nine, urk, hundred thousand dollars" Tweek said, shrugging as if it was no big deal.

"NINE HUNDRED THOUSAND? What kind of mansion are we talking about here?" Kyle shrieked out, stepping back a bit out of shock.

"It's called the, gah man alive!, Espiritu Estate. It's just a l-little summer home. Is that too, Jesus, expensive?" Tweek asked, blinking.

"YES it's expensive!" Kyle said, exasperated.

"Well, how much is in, gah, your wallet right n-now?" Tweek asked, grasping onto his own blond hair.

"Not much…" Kyle answered, taking out his wallet and searching through it.

"SOLD!" Tweek yelled out, cursing afterwards at the pressure.

"Huh?" Kyle said, dumbfounded.

"Can you m-move in today?" Great. Too much pressure! Just empty your pockets, and, gah, the Estate is yours" Tweek managed out.

"Give you all my money?" Kyle whimpered out, looking like a wounded puppy.

"It's a nine hundred, gah, thousand dollar house, and, urk, you're getting it for pocket ch-change. Take it or leave it!" Tweek yelled out.

"Take it!" Kyle said, astonished at the amount of bite that could come out of one twitchy, skinny little boy.

He handed over the money and stuffed his wallet back into his pocket, sighing at the loss of all his money and how he now had no money in his pocket.

"Thanks! I wish, gah, I could give you a ride into town, but I don't have a car, and besides…"

Kyle listened to Tweek as he flailed his arms around and grinned, somewhat.

"I'M NEVER GOING BACK TO THAT HORRIBLE PLACE AGAIN!" Tweek yelled out.

Kyle jumped back at Tweek's outburst and flinched at the sharp tone of it.

"There's something wrong with this 'Espiritu Estate', isn't there?" Kyle blanched and couldn't help the shudder that went down his spine when he thought about what could be wrong with this house.

"WRONG with it? W-What could, ah, be wrong? It's a perfectly, gah, good house" Tweek said, smiling like a mad man.

"Wow, that's very convincing. Thank you" Kyle said, sarcastically.

"No p-problem! Anything, ngh, else you want to, urk!, bother me about before you go? Mother of crap!" Tweek asked, shaking his head a little to the side.

"Nope, all done!" Kyle said, quickly and left not wanting to stick around. Although, he had to be honest here that he did like Tweek the best out of all the nut-jobs in this little part of town. Sure, he looked to be a crazy mental…but other than that, he wasn't half bad.

Once he had left Tweek to do whatever he did normally, Kyle made his way out of the shop and walked over to where he was sure Officer Clyde would be.

Sure enough, there was Officer Clyde, patrolling the outside of the little Curio Shoppe.

Kyle stopped in front of him to have a talk.

"Hi, Officer Clyde!" Kyle greeted, happily.

"Hey Kyle, do you have that place yet?" Officer Clyde asked.

"Bella sold me her place" Kyle said gravely, still hung up on the fact that something could possibly be _wrong _with the Espiritu Estate.

"Great! Well, whenever you're ready, just get into my car…" Officer Clyde said, grinning.

'_Why does my mind think that sounds perverted?' _Kyle thought to himself before he shook those thoughts away. "All right, thanks!"

Kyle walked over to the car and hopped in. The car was a normal police car but it looked a bit rusty. Mind you, Kyle wasn't going to be picky now that he actually had his ride into town. He watched as Clyde got into the car with him and put his keys into the ignition.

And then they were off.

The drive was boring. To Kyle at least anyway…

Officer Clyde seemed to be very happy, just jamming along to old eighties songs and eating what looked to be a bag of tacos. He even started asking Kyle to join in but Kyle was all too reluctant not to get involved with singing in a police car. Kyle slid in the seat in shame as he saw people looking at them with what looked to be freaked out expressions. Kyle's face went red…

Thankfully, they got their in little time and Kyle was happy to get out of the car and stood there, thanking the lord and even so much as getting on his knees and praying to never have to get in the car again. Yeah, sure, he looked a bit stupid but right now he'll pray to anyone just so that he doesn't have to get in the car.

He got up and took a look around. In all honesty, the place didn't look…all too bad. I mean, sure, there were bits of rubbish scattered around the place and what looked to be fairly weird people but…who was he to judge? Although he thought he even saw a Scottish man if the kilt was anything to go by. Now those were the types of people he didn't get along with…

Officer Clyde walked up to him and grinned.

"Here we are! Paradise place!"

"Which house is mine?" Kyle asked and looked around. They all looked to be fairly nice houses. In fact, some of them looked relatively clean.

"You're staying in the Espiritu Estate; I'll keep my car parked in front of it so you can find it" Officer Clyde said and Kyle was sure he had to thank him later but right now, not so much.

Kyle looked up to it and his mouth dropped. It was a tall white house with many beautiful, crystal clear windows with perfectly cream coloured curtains draping down from the side from the inside. The whole house was lined with a thick, long bush curving around the corners of the house and the path leading up to the door. The entrance to the house itself was magnificent. It held a rather big and rounded water fountain outside of it and a Greek looking stand just on the left hand corner of the beige coloured double doors. There was a black gate that you had to open right before going into the part where the water fountain was placed.

"Wow, it's huge…Bella sure has a lot of money" Kyle breathed out, excited that this amazing house was his.

"Yeah, and I notice she took all of YOUR money, too…here, have some of mine" Officer Clyde said, kindly handing over eight hundred dollars.

"Whoa! Where'd you get THAT?" Kyle asked, flabbergasted.

"Oh, you know. Crime scenes, criminals, holes in the ground. I've got a whole pile of cash in the car" Officer Clyde informed him, grinning and winking. He sure was proud of his job.

"Um…all right…Well, I guess I'd better head on in and meet my 'butler'…" Kyle got out, slowly and unsurely.

Officer Clyde looked at him and grinned before waving his hand over the whole place. "You should walk around and meet ALL your neighbours, actually. Good people around here"

"What can you tell me about them?" Kyle asked, hesitantly.

"Well, I don't know them THAT well…you've got Butters Stotch, the inventor…" Officer Clyde started.

Kyle listened, intrigued by all these weird names.

"…Wendy Testaburger; you know I heard she's getting married again?..."

Kyle lidded his eyes and raised one eyebrow. "You don't say" He drawled out, not in the least bit interested in knowing that.

"…There's the Marsh couple; a couple of scientist types…"

Kyle nodded and contemplated whether he actually wanted to _get to_ _know _these neighbours.

"…And of course, Doctor Cartman" Officer Clyde finished, grinning.

Hearing that name, Kyle remembered it back from the caller ID he had checked on after he had talked to that guy on the phone. His eyes widened.

"What do you know about Doctor Cartman?" Kyle asked, quickly.

"Not a blame thing" Officer Clyde answered, looking puzzled.

"Figures. I'll seeya" Kyle said, his eyes narrowing at the officer.

"So long! Come back and see me later on. I may have some work for you" Officer Clyde grinned as he waved at Kyle who had begun to walk away.

"All right" Kyle waved back over his shoulder and then turned his head back to walk towards the big mansion he now called 'home'.

Kyle walked through the gates, through the double doors into the house and looked around for the first time. _'Not bad, not bad at all'_

The red head then saw a butler wandering around, looking as happy as ever. He seemed to be waving his arms around and just searching his blue eyes around for entertainment. Kyle walked over to him to talk to him.

"Dum-de-dum, cleaning the house…" He sung and then all of a sudden screamed when he looked at Kyle. Kyle raised an eyebrow and waved back, hesitant.

"Oh! You scared me! I thought you were another…" He started saying but his sentence died out at the very end.

"Another what?" Kyle asked, suspicious.

Oh, nothing. What are you doing here?" He asked, his gloved hands resting atop his hips as he tried changing the topic.

"I'm the new owner. Tweek Tweak gave me the keys on his way out of town" Kyle explained, still wanting to figure out why this butler screamed but let it drop for now.

"Oh NO! Not master Tweek! He was so nice, and I thought that FINALLY I'd found someone who might stay!" Butler Kenny whined out before sighing and drooping the whole top part of his body forward.

"You go through a lot of owners?" Kyle asked, worried.

"No-one ever stays here for more than a week! After a while, seeing so many people come and go…it's just as lonely as having no-one at all!" Butler Kenny spoke out, throwing his arms in the air. His blue eyes looked pitiful and Kyle felt some pity for him. Being lonely sucked ass…

"Why do they leave? Does the roof leak or something?" Kyle asked, looking at the roof with uncertainty.

"Even if it did, you wouldn't notice out here in the desert, would you?" Butler Kenny gave a lazy grin and scratched his blond hair.

"I suppose not. What's the problem, then?" Kyle asked, still not sure of this place.

"I guess they just don't like ME. I try to be a good butler, I keep everything clean, but I just can't make them happy!" Butler Kenny whined out, pouting a little and grumpily crossing his arms across his chest.

Kyle awkwardly patted him on the back of his tail-coated tuxedo. "There, there…I'm sure you're an excellent butler. It has to be something else"

Kenny looked at him with his eyebrows furrowed and bit his lip. "Well, maybe there is ONE other thing…"

Kyle sighed and gritted his teeth. There's always something else…

"Tell me about it" He said, through his teeth.

"Oh, dear…this is just so HARD to explain…especially to a newcomer" Butler Kenny uncomfortably said and started fiddling with his fingers.

"I pay your salary, so you'd better tell me everything you know" Kyle said, glaring.

"I think it'll be easier if I SHOW you what's going on" Butler Kenny said, grinning uneasily.

"All right…" Kyle said, really worried and tense now.

"Why don't you take a walk around the house? Peek into a few of the rooms" Butler Kenny explained.

"What exactly am I looking for?" Kyle asked, not really sure as to why he was listening to him.

"You'll see, trust me. Check out the music room and the master bedroom, specifically" Butler Kenny grinned at Kyle but it didn't help to make the Jew feel any better.

"This better be good…" Kyle said, and walked off. Butler Kenny waved him away and Kyle gulped. Oh God…

Walking over to an archway, Kyle walked into the room. It was decorated with a red carpet and one window with brown blinds. The only thing in the room was a stereo and that was it. As Kyle thought Butler Kenny was talking a load of bull, he turned and got the sight of his life.

Right there was a see-through ghost only in swimming trunks. The ghost pulled a silly face at Kyle who screamed and threw his arms up in the air, running out of the room through another door. It was the master bedroom and it looked to hold only one bed. Kyle panted and held his chest in fear.

As he thought he was safe, another ghost popped up out of nowhere and pulled another silly face. This ghost looked to have brown scruffy hair and rock punkish hair.

Kyle screamed and got the hell out of there. He ran right back into the main part of the house, which by the way had nothing in it, and leaned forward, placing his hands on his knees as he tried to get his breathing in order. His eyes were wide and he looked like he was in so much shock. Well, duh, he would be considering he saw two ghosts all in one day who mocked him. He has a right to be scared!

Butler Kenny came over to him and smirked, with his hands behind his back. "Hello, sir. I hope you're having a pleasant day"

"With all these ghosts around, I should start charging RENT…" Kyle drawled out sarcastically which earned him a sharp laugh from Butler Kenny.

"Well…I don't think you'll get much money out of our friends here, but…" Butler Kenny explained, smirking still.

"Yes?" Kyle asked, still trying to calm his heavily beating heart.

"You COULD invite a couple of roommates to stay here, if you wanted to" Butler Kenny explained, and looked toward the music room, smirking.

"Really? And I could charge them rent?" Kyle asked, curious.

"RENT might be a bit much. I think that might be against a zoning regulation or something" Butler Kenny said, placing his index finger against his chin in thought.

"Then what's the point?" Kyle asked, completely missing the point of friendship and understanding others. Stupid Jew…

"What, aside from FRIENDSHIP? Let me see…they could help you pay with the utility bills" Butler Kenny explained, a bit shocked that he missed the point of friendship. Me too, Kenny, me too…

"So if I invite some roommates to stay here, my bills get cheaper?" Kyle asked, suddenly very eager for roommates.

"If you want to put it in the most selfish possible way, then yes" Butler Kenny bit out, suddenly angry.

"How do I get a roommate?" Kyle asked, completely ignoring Butler Kenny's anger.

"To get a roommate, all you have to do is CALL someone, INVITE them over, then PROPOSE that they come and live with you" Butler Kenny answered.

"And they'll say yes?" Kyle asked.

"Sure, if they don't already have their own place, and if they actually WANT to live with you" Butler Kenny explained, smirking.

"Why wouldn't they want to live with me?" Kyle asked, hurt.

"It all depends on how much they like you. If you're close friends, they'll probably stick around" Butler Kenny answered.

"And if they're not?" Kyle asked, as if it wasn't obvious.

"I hope you're good at taking rejection" Butler Kenny drawled out, looking around bored.

"Okay" Kyle answered back, suddenly nervous.

"So, what can I do for you?" Butler Kenny asked.

"This house is HAUNTED!" Kyle blurted out suddenly remembering what happened earlier.

"'Haunted' is such an ugly word…I'd like to say occupied" Butler Kenny smirked and winked.

"It's 'occupied' by some big, mean, scary GHOSTS!" Kyle screeched out, looking around wildly for anymore.

"Oh, no! Please, don't run away! There are only three ghosts, and they are really nice, I promise!" Butler Kenny pleaded, gripping Kyle's forearms in despair.

"Three? I only saw one or two" Kyle said, suddenly aware that another dude was holding him this way. Flushing, he tried to get out of the hold this butler had on him.

"Oh! Um, well…I MEANT two. Yes, only TWO ghosts" Butler Kenny said, nervously.

"Well, they're trying to kill me!" Kyle said, desperately.

"They're just lonely. The ghosts have all been trapped here so very long…they'll do anything for attention!" Butler Kenny said, his eyes crinkling as he grinned wide.

"Can't they just…move on? Go into the light or something?" Kyle asked, not thinking about anything but those ghosts killing him.

"No, silly, it doesn't work that way. These people turned into ghosts because they CAN'T leave" Butler Kenny explained, chuckling at Kyle's stupid attitude towards the ghosts.

"Why not?" Kyle asked.

"Don't you ever watch any movies? Ghosts hang around because they have unfinished business" Butler Kenny explained, snickering and poking his tongue out.

"Like what?" Kyle asked, suddenly intrigued.

"Like Gregory, the ghost in the music room? He says he used to be the richest man in town, until he married Wendy Testaburger" Butler Kenny explained, looking at the music room with sorrowful eyes.

"What happened?" Kyle asked, following to where Butler Kenny's eyes were.

"He 'mysteriously' died, and she took all his money!" Butler Kenny exclaimed, looking back to Kyle with anger.

"Remind me never to meet her" Kyle answered back, looking angry himself.

"It happened when he was swimming in the pool. He turned around for a second, and suddenly, the ladder was gone!" Butler Kenny explained, looking like he wanted to grip something and snap it in half.

Kyle gasped and didn't know what to say.

"He couldn't get out of the pool! He swam and swam, but eventually, he drowned!" Butler Kenny said, gravely.

"How do you know it was really Wendy? Did he see her do it?" Kyle asked, growing more and more interested.

"Well, no-one actually SAW it. And the police never found the body, so Gregory never got a proper burial" Butler Kenny explained, looking more displeased than when Kyle first entered.

"Does that really matter?" Kyle asked.

"Of course it does! Unless Gregory gets buried with honour, he'll never get any closure, and he'll be stuck here forever!" Butler Kenny dragged his hands down his face to show how extreme this was.

"So…if I find Gregory's remains and bury them, he'll get out of my music room?" Kyle asked, suddenly all too wary of finding these things out.

"Yes, if you want to be completely selfish about it" Butler Kenny said, narrowing his eyes and lowering his eyelids.

"Hey, this is MY house. I'll do whatever it takes to kick these ghosts out for good!" Kyle demanded, pointing towards the music room.

"You are SO MEAN!" Butler Kenny screamed and glared, stalking off.

Kyle watched as his butler walked away from him muttering about selfish red heads and their fear of dead people. Kyle blinked and then sighed.

How was he going to live in a mansion with an angry butler and two ghosts..?

* * *

><p><strong>AN: **Kyle's really not made a good impression on Kenny, has he? :| Kyle, you're such a stupid Jew XD Learn to make better conversations! Another thing; No, Wendy's not a bitch in this story. Wait until much later chapters to find out why she killed Gregory ;P

Remember to review and let me know what you think! :D


	3. Wendy's Strange Items

**Title**: Sims2 PSP: South Park Style

**Characters**: Stan, Kyle, Cartman, Kenny, Butters, Craig, Tweek, Token, Clyde and some others.

**Rating**: T

**Summary**: Kyle gets stuck in a weird town called Strangetown. "That's a…er…strange name for a town"

**Pairings**: Hints of any pairing, really. I don't know what pairings are going to be in this…

**Warnings!** Hints of homosexuality. Swearing, Weirdness and possible violence.

**Disclaimer**: I do not own any of the South Park characters. They belong to **Matt Stone** and **Trey Parker**.

Reviews!

**Raining Skittles- **Haha, thank you~! :D

**Cupcake Queen Liz- **Really? I find it fun to write about so I'm glad you find it fun to read ;P

If Clyde found out, he probably wouldn't care. Just shrug it off XD Mambo Bebe's so funny :L She just doesn't know not to cross the line between funny and insane. You'll see why Kenny's the butler soon enough ;D No, Wendy's Hazel Dente XD Who's Olive? :)

I shall update. Yeah, phones are hard to type on and especially when you want to give a long review.

**ThenNerds- **Yeah, the game is pretty freaky in some places where you don't know what's going to happen next and all that. I would say the freakiest part, for me, is when you're trying to get that garbage man out of the mad scientist's house and they're constantly stopping you from unlocking the door they're trapping him behind. Thank you~! I tried to make them match their personalities as much as possible :D Oh no, I did? XD Could you tell me where so I can change it? Will do~! :)

**A/N: **So, I've finally been able to update this because I writing the other chapter for my OC story. It's refreshing to work with something non-OC related. Not that I don't enjoy OC stories, it's just that when you work only on an OC story, you just kind of get a bit tired of it.

Anyways, I had to get another cage to split up my two guinea pigs because they both turned 6 months old at some point earlier and when that happens they start becoming aggressive, apparently…Weird, huh?

Enjoy! :D

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><p>Kyle had looked all over this place to find Gregory's remains but he couldn't find them anywhere. Whoever said finding a dead man's ashes or what not was easy needs a kick in the balls. Besides, how was he to know if they were anywhere near his house anyway? Ugh, he should just go and ask Butler Kenny for help again.<p>

Walking up to the butler and giving him a sigh, he stopped in front of the tall blond. Butler Kenny turned to him and smiled. Obviously he had calmed down…

"Hello, sir. I hope you're having a pleasant day" Butler Kenny greeted, politely.

"Hello…" Kyle replied, uncertainly.

"So, what can I do for you?" Butler Kenny grinned, cheekily.

"I can't find Gregory's remains" Kyle pouted and stomped his foot in irritation.

"Well, he was drowned in the pool behind Wendy's house. That should give you something to go on" Butler Kenny winked and pointed towards the doors leading out of the house.

Kyle glared and felt a migraine coming on. Sighing, he walked towards the doors. "I guess…"

He opened the doors and stepped out into the front garden before walking up to the double gates. He unlocked them, pushed them open and then walked along the path lined with bushes.

Outside, he noticed quite a lot of people were walking around, just stopping and talking to each other or going for a stroll. He never realized a neighbourhood could be this weird. A tap on his shoulder made him swivel around and he came face to face with Officer Clyde who grinned at him.

"What do you think of Paradise Place?" Officer Clyde asked, tilting his hat and placing his right hand on his hip.

Kyle looked around before turning back to Officer Clyde. "I'm reserving judgement until I've seen a bit more of it"

Officer Clyde nodded and smiled. "My thoughts exactly. You know, we've been having a bit of trouble here, lately"

Kyle's face went blank and his body froze. Why did he have a bad feeling Officer Clyde was going to ask a favour of him..?

"What kind of trouble?" Kyle asked, nervous.

"ALL kinds of trouble. Do you want to hear about the graveyard or the garbage man?"

"What's up with the graveyard?" Kyle asked.

"Oh, this whole neighbourhood was built on a graveyard" Officer Clyde explained.

"Isn't that kind of disrespectful?" Kyle raised one eyebrow and crossed his arms together.

"Tell me about it! The dead around here are really ticked off, too!" Officer Clyde said, his face making exuberant expressions.

"How can you tell?" Kyle asked, curious.

"Because I gotta spend every night up here sticking them back in their graves!" Officer Clyde almost sounded like he was yelling when he said that and his tone sounded tired.

"They GET OUT OF THEIR GRAVES!" Kyle shouted, his green eyes widening automatically.

"Of course! Wouldn't you, if someone built a house on your head?" Officer Clyde asked, furrowing his eyebrows.

"I…guess so" Kyle answered, uncertainly.

"Hey, if you want to make some money, come back here any time, and pick up that shovel over there" Officer Clyde grinned, pointing to a rusty, old shovel lying against a tree in a graveyard that was in the middle of the whole neighbourhood.

"Uh…thanks, I guess" Kyle said, his face showing how disgusted he was. He then remembered another thing. "What's up with that garbage man?"

Officer Clyde looked at Kyle with a weird expression, angry almost. "He's missing" He deadpanned.

"Missing?" Kyle repeated the last word Officer Clyde had said with a questioning tone to it as he wondered what on earth Officer Clyde was talking about.

"Gone. Haven't you noticed all the trash lying around? I can't find him to save my life" Officer Clyde explained.

"Where could he have gone?" Kyle asked, confused and a bit worried.

"I have no idea, but if you find him, you should tell him to get back to work. His name's Stuart McCormick" Officer Clyde said, giving Kyle a rather stern look.

Kyle glared back. "Where should I look for a missing garbage man?"

"If I knew that, do you think he'd still be missing?" Officer Clyde asked, sarcastically.

Now, let's see if Kyle can catch onto that sarcasm.

"Maybe not…" Kyle murmured. Hooray, he actually did realize~!

"Well, that's everything. Oh…And if you could pick up some of this garbage while Stuart is away…" Officer Clyde started.

"You'll give me money?" Kyle asked, hopefully. Huh, I guess Cartman was right about Jews and money after all…

"Ha! That's a good one. Selling garbage to a cop. Who would think of a thing like THAT?" Officer Clyde joked, laughing under his breath.

Kyle stood there, agitated and raising one eyebrow, waiting for Officer Clyde to stop using sarcasm and to start being serious. You know, Kyle, you brought this on yourself.

"Try selling it to shopkeepers. There's a recycling program, and they can make a nice profit" Officer Clyde explained, grinning.

"Okay, thanks! Seeya!" Kyle furrowed his eyebrows and started walking away from the officer, hoping to never have a chat with him again.

A ringing sound caught his attention and he looked down at his pockets where his phone was, feeling the vibration through his jeans. Shuffling through his pocket, Kyle picked out his phone and pressed the green button before placing the phone over his ear.

"Hello, its Kenny…I just wanted to let you know that your bills have just arrived" Butler Kenny's voice spoke down the phone.

"Bills? What for?" Kyle asked.

"Oh, you know…utilities and stuff. Property taxes. The more stuff you own, the more expensive your bills are" Butler Kenny explained.

"How do I pay them?" Kyle asked, his voice becoming more high-pitched. All the stress was really getting to him.

"Just come home and grab them. I'll leave them sitting just inside the door" Butler Kenny instructed.

Kyle smiled and looked towards his house. "All right, thanks!"

"Just do it quickly, okay? If you wait more than three days, you'll get in trouble…"

Kyle scrunched his nose up, the word trouble making his stomach turn. "I'll keep that in mind"

Kyle placed his phone in his pocket and looked at his house before looking at the house that was labelled Dr Cartman. He didn't know whether to go and speak to the weird guy on the phone or go and pay his bills…

He chose to go and visit this Dr person instead because he really needed his car situation sorted out. So, he walked up to the door and knocked. A 'Come in' was shouted out to him so he opened the door and walked inside, looking around at the daunting room that was the living room which was attached to the kitchen. He walked past a bathroom and looked to his left to see a library with some tall, quite chubby guy standing next to a bookcase in a suit. Walking over to the guy, he coughed to grab the man's attention.

Soon, the guy put the book down he was reading and turned towards him, giving Kyle a pleasant smile.

"Oh! You found your way here! Excellent!"

Kyle grinned. "Yup! I'm ready to go to work!"

Dr Cartman smirked, maliciously. "This job is really very simple. Ah am a philosopher of sorts. And ah trade in secrets"

Kyle raised an eyebrow and shook his head a little. "What kind of secrets?"

"Not the kind old ladies trade over picket fences. Secrets of life, the universe…everything" Dr Cartman explained, his hands waving about in gestures.

"So you want me to find out secrets for you?" Kyle asked, sceptical of all this.

"Yes, exactly. Ah want you to explore the neighbourhood, interview people, and bring me the secrets you discover" Dr Cartman grinned, maliciously.

"Great! I'll get right on that" Kyle said, slowly.

"When you discover a secret, bring it to me, and you can sell it for good money" Dr Cartman placed a hand on his chin and gave a sly grin to the Jew.

"Will you buy any secret?" Kyle asked, nervous.

"Ah'll pay you a little money for just about anything…" Dr Cartman said, slowly.

Kyle listened and cocked his left hip out, waiting patiently for the man to continue.

"…But if you want the BIG bucks, you'll find me the secrets that ah'm truly interested in"

Kyle raised an eyebrow and sighed. "And you're looking for deep mysteries of the universe"

"Precisebaly. So, are you up to it?" Dr Cartman asked, eagerly.

"Of course!" Kyle answered, just as eagerly, trying to ignore the mispronounced word.

"Well, to make it more interesting, if you bring me FIVE more secrets, ah'll actually pay you a bonus!" Dr Cartman reasoned.

"Great! You'll hear from me soon!" Kyle announced, happily.

Kyle then walked off, smiling giddily. Uh, Kyle…aren't you forgetting something?

Kyle stopped, and blinked before slapping his forehead in embarrassment. "Oh shit, I forgot. I already have enough secrets"

Kyle, having figured this out _oh so amazingly_, went back into the library where Dr Cartman was walking around looking at his many books. Kyle sighed, shaking his head and moved forward.

Dr Cartman smiled mockingly, before placing his book down. "Back so soon?"

"Yeah, yeah, do you want the secrets or not?" Kyle asked, aggravated.

"Go ahead" Dr Cartman said, smirking at Kyle's anger.

"Okay, well, Token thinks that Michelangelo painted the Mona Lisa" Kyle said, beaming proudly.

Dr Cartman smiled, awkwardly. "Well, it's not really what ah'm after, but ah'll still give you a hundred dollars for it"

Kyle felt his eyebrow twitch and his mouth turn into a frown but he nodded, tensely anyway. "Yeah, sure"

Kyle pocketed the money before trying to remember the other secret he had found out. When he remembered, he grinned. "Tweek is running away because he was abducted by aliens"

"That's still not what ah'm looking for butah shall give you the same amount as the last time"

Kyle took the money with a glare and felt his anger boil inside of him. How dare him…

"Mambo Bebe hides her donuts in the trash can in the restroom. Gross, right?"

"Indeed…Still, not that good though" Dr Cartman, however, placed another hundred dollars into Kyle's hand.

"The Espiritu Estate is haunted by three scary ghosts" Kyle sighed and waited for the answer.

"That's still not that good but here's your hundred dollars" Dr Cartman grinned.

"Some girl called Heidi held the high score on the town's only pinball machine before it broke. Mysteriously" Kyle explained, holding his hand out.

"Here's your last hundred dollars. All of them were rubbish but at least you tried" Dr Cartman said, not caring that he was angering the Jew.

Dr Cartman then turned around and Kyle felt himself seethe. Tapping him on the shoulder, Kyle watched as Dr Cartman turned around and greeted him with a frown.

"Yes? What is it?"

"I just gave you five secrets. You said I'd get a bonus…" Kyle explained, hopeful.

Dr Cartman smirked. "Oh, right! Your bonus! Let me just get it out…"

Kyle watched as Dr Cartman started pulling out a contraption of sorts and got confused. "What's that? What are you getting out?"

Dr Cartman then laughed manically and pointed what appeared to be a laser gun with all kinds of buttons holding it together. In less than a second, Dr Cartman started being surrounded by bright lights and a gush of wind that had Kyle shielding his eyes and trying to hold onto his hat at the same time. The lights surrounded the whole of Dr Cartman and once the lights disappeared, so did Dr Cartman, leaving only an empty space of where he used to be.

Kyle blinked at the shock of seeing Dr Cartman actually teleport himself somewhere away from here and he had to rub his eyes to make sure he was seeing it correctly.

Kyle looked around to see if he could spot the doctor but he couldn't find him anywhere. _'Think, Kyle, think. Where would a psychotic doctor, possible thief, go? _

Just then, Kyle saw a book sticking out of the bookcase and raised an eyebrow. He looked around and went back to looking at the book, sticking out. He wondered if this was anything like those mystery films where the bookcase made the bookcase reveal a secret hideaway…

Shrugging, Kyle decided he was insane enough to try it and walked forward. He stepped in front of the bookcase and examined the books. He pulled on the book and waited. He still waited until a couple of minutes passed and nothing. Frowning, he stomped his foot and waved his arms around.

"God dammit, it's not like those movies! Now this has just made me look like a complete moron and for what? Nothing! God bloody dammit!" Kyle shouted, face red and eyes scrunched together while he waved his fists around until suddenly, he knocked over the book next to the one stuck out and watched, with wide eyes, as the bookcase made a rickety, old creaking noise as it backed up before sliding open ever so slowly.

Kyle blinked before slowly, lowering his arms and standing there. "Huh…"

He walked over to the bookcase and looked in. It was eerily dark and there seemed to be a small storage room with just two boxes stacked together inside of it and then an open doorway to a more filled and lit up room. Walking through, Kyle walked into the room and gasped. Dr Cartman was there and he looked…different.

Dr Cartman stood there dressed in a red suit with a red mask on and a brown hair piece sticking out of the forehead, ridiculously stupid looking and a huge green diamond stamped in the middle of his chest while he wore red spandex trousers and a grey cloak. He was smirking, evilly and seemed to be waiting for Kyle to get there.

"Oh, dear. It looks like you've found me" Dr Cartman said, slowly in a teasing sense of tone.

"Yeah, I found you. I want my money" Kyle gritted out.

"BWAH HA HA HA HA! You really are pathetic, Kahl" Dr Cartman insulted, his tone cruel and mocking.

"Yeah, well…"

"Let me ENLIGHTEN you!" Dr Cartman chuckled and started waving his hand in front of Kyle's face, placing the other hand on his own head and staring into Kyle's green eyes with his own brown, almost red, eyes.

"…" Kyle stood there, his eyes blank and his face emotionless.

"Aw, nothing to say? Has my mind control device dulled your wit?" Dr Cartman bit out, smirking the whole time.

"…"

Dr Cartman then frowned and the air around them seemed to tense up. "Let me explain how this is going to work"

"You are going to do everything ah say" Dr Cartman commanded, his eyes never leaving Kyle's and his hand never stopping from waving in front of Kyle's face.

"If you fail to do everything ah say, this mind control device will drive you mad" Dr Cartman explained.

Kyle's eyes didn't even blink and his whole body was stiff.

"Say you understand" Dr Cartman commanded.

"I understand" Kyle said, hollowly.

Dr Cartman smirked. "Excellent, you really are very clever. Heh heh heh"

Kyle stood stiff, still and Dr Cartman smirked, loving the way this was going.

"Now, you are going to walk out this door and leave me alone. Do you understand?" Dr Cartman asked.

"I understand" Kyle's empty voice answered, his green eyes dull.

"Then you will go about your normal life until ah summon you again. Do you understand?" Dr Cartman asked, grinning.

"I understand" Kyle answered, obediently.

"Perfect. You may go. Ah will speak with you again soon"

"Yes, Dr Cartman"

Dr Cartman then straightened up and looked at Kyle before glaring. "Please, address me by my real name. DOCTOR COON!"

"Goodbye, Doctor Coon" Kyle said, blank still.

After that was all said and done, Dr Cart-I mean, Dr Coon took out his little device and teleported himself away, leaving Kyle standing there, not even saying anything or doing anything.

'_Leave Dr Coon's house' _some voice in his head told him and, without him doing anything, his body listened and did exactly that, just running and running out of the weird house.

Once outside of the house, Kyle shook his head and suddenly, he felt as if he had control of his own body again and looked around, eyes wide. His body suddenly felt…whole again. It didn't feel…empty. He didn't have any clue what that was all about but he knew staying outside probably wasn't the best idea right now.

So, without a thought on whose house he may be barging in on, he ran into the closest one to him and slammed the door with a scared expression on his face. His hands shook and his whole skin felt cold with sweat running down it in beads while his breaths came out in shallow gasps.

He slid down the door with his eyes closed and his chest heaving up and down. Swallowing, his waited for a couple of minutes while he calmed down. Once he did, he opened his eyes, stood up and only then did he realize he had barged in on someone else's home.

All of a sudden, a lady with black hair and a warm smile on her face walked over to him before standing in front of him.

"Hey there, sweet thing! What brings you over to my place?" The lady asked, cheekily and grinned.

"Oh, sorry, I really didn't mean to come into your home without asking" Kyle apologized quickly, making sure to calm himself down enough to think rationally about this.

"Oh, no, it's not a problem. My name's Wendy Testaburger, what's yours?" Wendy asked.

"M-my name's Kyle Broflovski, I'm your new neighbour" Kyle stammered, nervously.

"Well, aren't you just precious? You move into the big house next door?" Wendy asked, cheerfully.

"Sure did!" Kyle answered back, happily albeit a little stunned by Wendy's kindness.

"Really…you must have a lot of money, then!" Wendy said, her eyes sparkling with joy.

"Actually, I got it really cheap" Kyle answered back, his grin becoming embarrassed.

"Oh, well, I'll see you later, then!" Wendy all of a sudden said, her words coming out fast.

"Um…okay, bye" Kyle said, his mind suddenly confused over that fairly quick farewell before turning to leave.

"Actually, wait, before you go…" Wendy called out and Kyle stopped. His eyes flickered over to the door before he cursed under his breath and sighed, turning around.

"Yes?" Kyle asked, his tone less than happy.

"I know what it's like to move to a new place. No money, no friends, nothing to do…" Wendy started, her tone becoming sympathetic.

"Sounds like me!" Kyle said, sarcastically.

"Well, I've been needing some work done around the house, but I'm just too busy to do it!" Wendy moaned, her face becoming tired.

"You want to hire me to help you with housework?" Kyle asked, shocked that instead of asking if he wanted to be friends, she was asking him to be her _bloody servant_.

"If you don't mind, of course! I'll pay you well. And there may even be…fringe benefits" Wendy said, fluttering her eyelashes.

"Okay, I'll think about it. What would I be doing?" Kyle asked, his tone becoming weary.

"Just talk to my fiancé, Stan, when you're ready. He'll tell you what to do" Wendy explained, smiling cutely.

"Thanks!" Kyle said, smiling back.

Wendy then walked off, leaving Kyle to wonder if she would ever kick him out of her house but considering she never did, Kyle thought it was safe to go and look for her husband.

So, he walked through the really nice looking bedroom, he walked into the bathroom and quirked an eyebrow when he saw her husband staring into the mirror, looking for non-existent pimples or something. Walking over to the man, he tapped his shoulder and flinched when he saw the other man jump at his touch. The man sighed in relief and smiled.

"Hi, I'm Stan! Can I help you?" Stan asked, curious as to why a stranger was in his house.

"Hi, I'm new in town! Just meeting the neighbours" Kyle commented, grinning.

"Oh, well, I'm not really a neighbour. Not yet" Stan said, blushing slightly.

"What do you mean?" Kyle asked, curious.

"Wendy and I are getting married next month!" Stan blurted out, excitedly.

"Congratulations!" Kyle grinned and patted the man's back.

"Yeah, it's pretty exciting. We're going to have the wedding out by the pool" Stan said, his eyes becoming loving.

"By the pool, huh? Sort of a beach theme?" Kyle asked, his interest increasing.

"No, it's to commemorate the day we met" Stan said, giddily.

Kyle got confused. "You met at a swimming pool?"

Stan shook his head, chuckling lightly under his breath. "No, actually, she hired me to clean her pool"

"Aw, she's marrying the pool boy! How romantic!" Kyle squealed, clapping his hands together in joy.

"We think so!" Stan squealed back.

Are these guys for real..?

"Well, if you need anything, let me know" Stan said, smiling politely.

"Actually, Wendy said you had some work for me?" Kyle pointed out.

"Oh, right, Wendy did say she'd be hiring somebody…and I guess that's you!" Stan said, excitedly, apparently happy that it was Kyle who was hired.

"Yup! So, what do you have for me?" Kyle asked, eager.

"I've got three jobs for you, actually. Think you're up to the challenge?" Stan asked, smirking.

"I accept your challenge!" Kyle answered back, grinning, looking like he was ready to take on the world.

"Here's what we've got…" Stan started.

"Yeah?"

"We need you to plant the garden, scrub the bathroom and make the hot dogs" Stan explained, smiling.

"Doesn't sound that bad" Kyle commented.

"Any questions about the work?" Stan asked, his blue eyes shining with glee.

"Tell me about planting the garden" Kyle asked, his ears perking up a little.

"Well, if you head out back, you'll see Wendy's flowerbed. It's the stretch of dirt off to the left" Stan pointed out the doorway and towards two glass doors, showing a garden through them.

"Right" Kyle said.

"We need you to buy some garlic seeds and plant them in that garden" Stan instructed.

"Where can I get garlic seeds?" Kyle asked, puzzled.

"Mambo Bebe should carry them. Once you've planted the garlic, feel free to harvest as much as you like" Stan said, grinning.

"All right, will do" Kyle mockingly saluted and poked his tongue out.

"Any more questions about the work?" Stan asked.

"Tell me about scrubbing the bathroom" Kyle demanded. He crossed his arms across his chest, ready to learn.

"That's the easiest job. Just go into the bathroom and clean anything that looks dirty" Stan explained, waving his arms around in a gesture.

"That IS easy" Kyle commented back, grinning from ear to ear.

"So, now do you have any more questions?" Stan asked, scratching his hair under his blue and red hat.

"Tell me about making hot dogs" Kyle rocked back and forth on his feet and waited for the instructions.

"Well, we only really need one hot dog, since Wendy's sort of a vegetarian…but I'll take as many as you want to make!" Stan said, grinning and rubbing his belly.

Kyle rolled his eyes at his childishness but couldn't help the small laugh that erupted from his mouth.

"Okay, so at least one hot dog. So how do I do it?" Kyle asked.

"Well, first, you get the ingredients you need out of the fridge" Stan explained.

"What if I don't see any hot dog ingredients in there?" Kyle asked, trying to find out every little detail.

You're making a hot dog for crying out loud, not the Great Wall of China…

"Oh, it's all in there. You just need to have enough skill to recognize it" Stan pointed to his head and grinned.

"All right, so I get some skill and look in the fridge. Then what?"

"Once you've got your ingredients, you'll need to use our oven to cook them"

Kyle gulped. "Sounds…reasonable"

"Now, don't eat the ingredients before you cook them, or you might get sick! I should know…" Stan mumbled the last part under his breath but Kyle was able to catch it loud and clear and had to hold down the giggles that wanted to escape from him.

"I'll remember that" Kyle got out.

"Oh, and bring me the meal when you're done. Doesn't do us any good if you eat it yourself" Stab chuckled.

"I guess not" Kyle said, looking at Stan with curiosity as to how he was a man and not a child.

"So, any more questions?" Stan asked, his hands behind his back.

"Nope, I'm good, thanks" Kyle said, appreciative of the help he received.

"Well, when you finish each job, make sure you come and see me. I'm the one who'll be paying you" Stan explained.

"Gotcha" Kyle answered, grinning.

Stan nodded his head, grinning and left the bathroom which they had been standing in, leaving Kyle to stand there, looking at it with disgust over how dirty it was.

Kyle rubbed his forehead with his index finger and thumb, feeling like the top of the world was leaning on him. _'Honestly, why couldn't they clean their own God damn bathroom?'_ Kyle thought to himself.

He walked over to the sink and looked at the grungy green taps. All of it was just a mess. Kyle then put on his determination face and nodded his head, ready for the task set on him. Picking up the yellow gloves, resting in a nearby cupboard, Kyle set to work on the sink, cleaning every bit of it.

Kyle scratched at the mould when all of a sudden; his fingers felt something when cleaning the drain. He moved his fingers around and pulled at the thing stuck in there before he finally yanked it out. Raising the object in front of his face, Kyle gasped as he saw he was looking at a scratched up wedding ring.

Kyle looked at it closely, trying to figure out why it was there and whose it was. Well, actually, it was plainly obvious as to whom the ring belonged to but Kyle just had to make sure…

Placing it in his pocket for further questioning, Kyle went onto to clean the toilet and then the bath. By the time he had finished, Kyle felt like he really needed cleaning himself. All he kept thinking about though was that scratched up ring. It just really bothered him that he didn't know why it was scratched up and why it was down the sink in the first place.

But he also needed the money from Stan to keep himself living until he got his car back. Deciding just to drop it for now, Kyle walked out of the bathroom, intent on finding Stan and telling him that one of the jobs had been finished.

When he found him, he waved towards him and smiled, nervously at him. "The bathroom is clean"

Stan grinned. "Great, here's your payment! Just two more jobs left to do!"

"Thanks" Kyle took the five hundred dollars and smiled, more comfortable now having almost forgotten the ring.

Stan then left him and Kyle took this chance to go and make that hot dog he was asked of. So, he walked into the kitchen and started the oven up as well as getting the ingredients from the fridge. Whilst searching in the fridge for the ingredients, he found a note and took a look at it.

'**Help, my wife is starving me to DEATH!'**

Kyle stumbled a bit and the ingredients he was previously holding in his arms dropped to the floor. He shakily folded the note and shook his head. What kind of house had he gotten into? And what exactly were these kinds of people..?

He put the ingredients in the oven and waited. The oven then dinged and he took the now fully made hot dog, looking at it with pride.

Wow, that took absolutely no work so you now have achieved nothing. Well done.

Kyle walked into the bedroom again and walked into the bathroom where Stan was, once again, checking his face in the mirror.

Rolling his eyes, Kyle made his way over to the man and greeted him once again. He was pretty sure Stan was getting sick and tired of him by now…

"Hello" Stan greeted, smiling and waving.

"Here's your food!" Kyle said, cheerfully.

"Great, here's your payment! Just one more job left to do" Stan said, grinning and then taking a huge bite out of the hot dog.

Kyle shuffled the five hundred dollars in his hand, grinning and not even paying attention to what Stan was saying right about now. "Thanks!"

Stan then walked away and that's when Kyle noticed he had disappeared. Shrugging, he walked out of the bathroom and walked out of the bedroom it was connected to. He walked out of their house, calling goodbye as he went and walked all the way to Officer Clyde's car. Officer Clyde then drove him all the way out to Mambo Bebe's Curio Shoppe again.

Stepping out of the car, Kyle ran up to the shop and opened the double doors. He walked through and noticed Tweek was still there but didn't even bother to stop him and talk with him because he was on a _mission_!

Walking up to the counter, Kyle waved at Mambo Bebe and grinned.

"I would like to buy the garlic seeds, please" Kyle asked, politely.

Mambo Bebe handed them over and Kyle paid her. He then left giving a farewell to both Mambo Bebe and Tweek, who just twitched and started screaming. Kyle shook his head, not even bothering to ask what was wrong with him.

He got back into Officer Clyde and they both drove back to Strangetown, where Kyle got out of the car and ran all the way to Wendy's house, eager to complete this.

When Kyle walked through the door, Wendy was talking on the phone and Stan was making a coffee in the kitchen but he paid no heed to them and walked up to the backdoor where he walked through and looked up. The night sky was already showing, it once a sky blue but was now a purple and dark blue mix.

Kyle huffed as he carried the bag of seeds all the way over to the garden patch and planted the big bag of seeds down on the ground. Once placed down, Kyle opened the seed bag and pulled out a couple of seeds. He then bent down and rummaged the mud to separate it and planted the seeds in.

Kyle was in the middle of burying the last seeds when his eyes caught sight of something buried in the mud. Looking around to make sure no-one was watching, Kyle picked the item out of the ground and lifted it up to have a closer look.

It was a pacemaker. What was a pacemaker doing buried in the mud out in the garden..?

Kyle sighed, placing the pacemaker in his pocket and vowing to ask Wendy about all these items he had found, before burying the last seeds finally. Standing up, Kyle looked down proudly at the garden. He knew that with proper care and attention, these seeds would grow in no time.

Kyle looked towards the house and then placed his hand in his pocket bringing out the scratched up ring, the starvation note and the dirty pacemaker. He was clueless on what all these things were doing in the places he had found them in but he was also nervous about asking Wendy about all these items.

It was none of his business but at the same time, Wendy could've killed all these husbands just like Kenny had told him she had done with Gregory. And if he didn't question her about these things, she may end up _killing Stan_! And that was something he didn't deserve. But at the same time, Wendy may just kill him for questioning her and finding this all out.

Oh, Jesus, what on earth was he going to do..?

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><p><strong>AN: **Wow, it's been too long since I updated this. But it's here now. Aren't you guys just overjoyed? :D

-Silence-

Remember to review and let me know what you think~! :3


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